How to be everything, and the complete opposite

I spent many years learning as much as I could about Abraham Lincoln — his life, his character, his leadership. The more I learned about him, the more confounding it got. It was hard to fathom who he truly was.

I wasn’t alone in my confusion about the famous American president. Josiah Holland, one of Lincoln’s earliest biographers, wrote, “The writer has conversed with multitudes of men who claimed to know Mr. Lincoln intimately; yet there are not two of the whole number who agree in their estimate of him. The fact was that he rarely showed more than one aspect of himself to one man. He opened himself to men in different directions.” 

Holland went on to recount the different qualities people attributed to Lincoln: “A very ambitious man.” “Without a particle of ambition.” “One of the saddest men that ever lived.” “One of the jolliest men that has ever lived.” “The most cunning man in America.” “Has not a particle of cunning in him.” “A leader of the people.” “Always led by the people.” “Cool and impassive.” “Susceptible to the strongest passions.”

Lincoln, in the way he behaved, was everything, and the complete opposite. 

Slowly, over the years, this all started to make sense. Lincoln was the president at a time when his nation was in crisis. He needed to display an acute understanding of the different high-stakes situations he was thrust into and adapt his behavior accordingly, without letting his personality or predilections limit his effectiveness.

This is the essence of outer success. 

You have to be everything, and the complete opposite. Sometimes adaptable, sometimes tenacious. Sometimes agreeable, sometimes assertive. Sometimes decisive, sometimes patient. It all depends on the situation. This versatility is what separates exemplary leaders from ordinary ones. 

Take a moment to reflect. Which qualities are you particularly adept at harnessing? What about their opposites? In which situations do you thrive as a leader, and which are the ones that challenge you most? 

The need to embody every quality can make the pursuit of outer success feel very demanding — even draining. But hold on.

Something else was also operating in Lincoln. His friend and law partner of twenty years, William Herndon, observed, “His pursuit of the truth… was indefatigable… Lincoln loved truth for its own sake… He saw all things through a perfect mental lens.” 

Lincoln leaned into the outer chaos from a place of inner harmony. ‍

Perhaps the secret to outer success lies in how you play your inner game. We’re onto a major discovery here, and we’ll lay this out in full splendor in our next newsletter.

Note: Parts of this newsletter are excerpted from my book, Inner Mastery, Outer Impact: How Your 5 Core Energies Hold the Key to Success.